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adoptee rights

This tag is associated with 20 posts

Why We Need to Give Voice to the Adoptee Experience

November is National Adoption Month, and adoptees use the opportunity to #flipthescript on the pro-adoption narrative so ingrained in society by sharing their experiences and viewpoints. Here’s what I’m doing to #flipthescript: When I tell people I’m a twice-reunited adoptee writing a book based on interviews about what it means to be adopted, they often ask questions … Continue reading

Finding my father

Some people celebrate their 50th birthdays by jumping out of airplanes. I belatedly marked mine in a similarly adventurous way, minus the parachute and clouds zooming by: Yesterday, I met my natural father. I’m an adoptee. Three years ago I found my first mother and an extended family that welcomed me with open arms. Still, I had to know the … Continue reading

New book will focus on what it means to be adopted

My adoption blogs put me in touch with thousands of other adoptees who encouraged me to write a book about my journey to find my birth mother. I appreciate those votes of confidence, but instead of writing about me, I have decided to write a book about you – the adoptees I’ve already met and … Continue reading

If we’re ever to get real about adoption, adoptees must be heard

I met Dave, a fellow adoptee, on the phone the other day. He was telling me about himself and his work, and mentioned that while growing up, he always felt like the odd one out in his family. “I’m adopted,” he confided, then explained he doesn’t know how much of his talents and skills to ascribe … Continue reading

‘S’ You, Too!

Once again, you can’t make this stuff up. I was at AAA in Stamford, CT, today to renew my driver’s license, looking to get a “verified” version with its extra-special star and identity protection. Except the bureaucrat there — I’ll call him “AAA Guy” — changed my identity. Yup; another set of bureaucrats in another … Continue reading

A Girl Like Her … and A Girl Like Me

Emotional day yesterday. I traveled to Hartford for the screening of Ann Fessler‘s acclaimed documentary, A Girl Like Her, which chronicles the 1 million+ women who relinquished their babies for adoption in the 1950s and ’60s. Access Connecticut, the grassroots group working to restore the right of adult adoptees born in the state to have … Continue reading

Quest for true understanding about the pain associated with adoption

Most Sundays, the New York Times’ Modern Love column makes me smile, or cry. Today’s sent me straight to the keyboard. Elizabeth Foy Larsen’s “Untying a Birth Mother’s Hands,” gets points for having the right instinct — to connect her adopted 6-year-old daughter to her roots — but what it has in heart it lacks … Continue reading

It’s Complicated: An Adoptee’s Road to Search, Part 1

I received a lovely note in my inbox last week: Judy, a friend from my school days, used my story in talking with her 12-year-old adopted daughter Mollie. It seems friends at camp were shocked to discover Mollie isn’t interested in searching for her birth parents. Judy told Mollie that she has Judy’s blessing if … Continue reading

What boobs!

Yesterday’s annual mammogram turned out to be an angst-laden event. No, not because there was any problem, thank goodness. Although standing topless in front of a stranger who is turning your breasts into pancakes is not the most pleasant way to start the day — especially when you keep wondering exactly how long a person … Continue reading

They’re looking into it … Christmas is coming, the check’s the mail. Oh hell, insert your cliche here

Got a letter from Albany this week. Yes, you could have knocked me over with a feather. Oh, not because I think Gov. Cuomo himself actually read my letter and its enclosed copy of my April 6 blog post urging passage of the adoptees’ rights legislation. I suspect some poorly paid intern plugged my name, … Continue reading