If you’re adopted, you’ve likely heard many of the comments below. (I even heard three of ones on this list from members of my biological family early in my reunion with them.)And if you’re not adopted, you may have uttered some of these chestnuts thinking you were being thoughtful and empathetic.
Trust me, you weren’t.
And on behalf of all adoptees, many of whom are working to #FliptheScript for National Adoption Awareness Month, I beg you to stop.
- You don’t look adopted.
- Who are your real parents?
- How much did you cost?
- What a gift you are to your adoptive parents.
- It was probably for the best. Who knows what kind of life you might have had otherwise?
- Why would you want to find your birth mother? She didn’t want you.
- I have a friend who is perfectly fine with being adopted.
- You must be so grateful to have been adopted.
- Your medical history isn’t that important. Just watch what you eat and exercise.
- Stop worrying about not fitting in with your family. Plenty of non-adopted people feel like that. It’s not a big deal.
- Why didn’t your real parents want you?
- I wish I was adopted.
- What would you do with your original birth certificate if you got it?
- You don’t know what you’ll get when you adopt.
- At least you weren’t aborted.