Bean there

If you had a few minutes to be thoughtful, you might guess that some important philosophical matter would be a great equalizer of people.

And you’d be wrong.

Turns out green beans in tomato sauce level the playing field.

Really.

Who knew my four hours of ladling green beans at our festival last night at the Church of the Archangels would turn out to be a lonely science experiment.

It seems people of all ages, from all walks of life and countless ethnic backgrounds equally despise the green bean.

Yes I am as shocked as you are. The green bean is, after all, one of the most neutral of the veggies, and one of my favorites, especially in tomato sauce.

Yet person after person passed up the chance to enjoy them, making a beeline instead for the spanikopita, the kabobs or the moussaka as I tried to wield my serving spoon.

Sometimes the responses were, well, a little overzealous.

“Never touch the stuff.”

“Why would I fill up on that?!”

“NO!” (said with any number of disgusted and/or frightened facial expressions, as though I was, perhaps, dishing up a spoonful of arsenic in my apron and funny hat).

Some people asked to peek under the cloche only to turn up their noses, and a few accepted a tiny portion as if taking their medicine.

Oh, there were a few for whom the green beans were a welcome sight. I was sure to match their enthusiasm with a big grin.

Mostly, however, the green beans took a back seat to the other food on the menu.

I’m heading back to church now for another shift.

Sure hope they give me another food to dish up.