New year, new me

Are you making any resolutions?

I used to. Back when I was a kid, I regularly resolved to

• be better about listening to my parents (probably lasted about a day)
• be nicer to my sister (might have lasted an hour)
• exercise (maybe took two long walks? How ironic that I am now a fitness instructor!)
• keep my room neater (eh…)

Then for a long time I eschewed resolutions, pretending that doing so was the height of being fashionable.

After having a week to (mostly) unplug, and a long conversation with my friend, Jacquie, last night in which we both admitted that we feel guilty doing even the most inconsequential things for ourselves, I’ve decided some resolutions are in order.

Note that I’m a slow learner, but have finally realized that no amount of micro-managing on my part can make other people adhere to resolutions chosen for them. So I won’t be working to instill healthier eating habits, additional chores or other goals for the other two people who live here.

Instead, these resolutions are all about me and that elusive quest for balance.

In 2013, I pledge to spend less time cleaning, running errands and worrying about cleaning and errands. I will make a concerted effort to compartmentalize the many facets of my life so that I can be fully present for each of them. And above all else, I will take care of myself and do things I want to do.

(When did I STOP reading for pleasure? I joked about it earlier this week, but seriously, when did Basil and I stop having actual conversations? Why haven’t my fingernails seen a coat of polish since summer? When did the weekly dinner rotation start to regularly include peanut butter sandwich night instead of a real meal?!)

I am determined to make time to breathe, find ways to relax, live my life instead of running through task after task.

And I will start this right away.

Right after I make the grocery list, vacuum up the pine needles, answer some email and put the Christmas decorations away.